The Artificial Grandma

My grandmother on my mother's side was the only grandma I had—my other grandma died the year I was born. She was in my life for my first 35 years, so she had an impact. Initially, she was accompanied by my grandfather, Meyer, who was a joy to be around. (Jeanette, not so much.) 

When Meyer died, Jeanette continued her life in Chicago. She'd come out to California to visit—for longer periods of time now—and to me, she was "grandma," a known quantity. But I didn't know her at all. What was artificial was the grandmother lens through which I viewed her. Jeanette was very much her own person when she could live independently. When she couldn't, then it got ugly. 

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